Emily Dievendorf, Director of Policy at Equality Michigan, writes in the Huffington Post:
“The first time I was called “greedy” it was by a drag queen at the Michigan Pride Festival. She wasn’t talking to me directly. She was calling out audience members in the unapologetic, hilarious, and crass way only a drag queen can, asking one attendee if she was a lesbian. The woman said, “No, I’m bi.” The drag queen responded, “Oh, you’re GREEEDY.” Everyone laughed, myself included. But I also left thinking, “So that’s how it is.”
I could never be “greedy.” I have terrible luck with women. But I probably wouldn’t date you, male or female, regardless of luck. I’m very particular, maybe to the point of delusion, and my interest rarely has to do with physical attraction above all else. You would need to be funny, clever, overly literate, cultured, and committed to social justice. I’m also a serial monogamist and loyal to a fault, unable to focus on more than one person at a time. I’m not your stereotype, but few of us are.
I believe sexuality, as a continuum with no easy boxes to fit into, is the most logical explanation for the variations we see in human sexuality. Labels are vile and unrealistic to me, an attempt to satisfy others’ need for simplicity when life just isn’t so. I have struggled with how I would explain myself, resentful that I had to at all. My partners have always known me to be fluid and I hadn’t considered it anybody else’s business. At a certain point I decided that I had to claim my place in the community because my own invisibility would be part of the perpetuation of others pretending I don’t even exist. I wrote ‘bi’ across my forehead and wore it proudly….
The stigma, or biphobia, that comes with being bisexual has serious consequences. Bisexuals have higher incidences of depression, suicidal thoughts and attempts, alcohol and drug abuse, and poor physical health in general than their heterosexual, gay and lesbian counterparts. Bisexuals most often don’t come out to their health provider and as a result receive incomplete information regarding their sexual health. Bisexual women with monosexual partners have an increased rate of domestic violence compared to every other female demographic. Compared to lesbians, bisexual women are twice as likely to live in poverty. Discrimination against bisexuals is greater in the workforce. While lesbians earn 2.7% less than straight men, bisexual women earn nearly 11% less.
There is an acute stress that comes from feeling like you are not a legitimate member of a community. In nonurban areas lesbians and bisexual women experience comparable levels of frequent mental distress, but in urban areas distress decreases for lesbians and nearly doubles for bisexual women. Resources and support are more likely to be available for lesbians in urban areas, and still likely to be nowhere to be found for bisexuals. Regardless of established need, projects addressing issues related to bisexuality are the least funded among programs for the lesbian, gay, bi, and transgender communities….”
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/emily-dievendorf/bisexual-invisibility-has_b_1370079.html
