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TW: Sexual Assault, Biphobia<\/b><\/p>\n
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Long-term Victim Blaming & why it sucks especially bad for Bisexual women.<\/b><\/u><\/p>\n
This post refers explicitly to women and femmes who have been victim to sexual violence from men. \u00a0There are some very different things male & masculine victims have to deal with, when violence comes from other genders. \u00a0Also women and femmes who are victims of violence from other women, deal with even less understood\/talked about effects.<\/i><\/p>\n
Most people are aware of victim blaming that comes up shortly after a traumatic event where sexual violence is reported.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat was she wearing?\u201d
\u201cWhy didn\u2019t she fight back?\u201d
\u201cWhy did she leave it so long to report it?\u201d
\u201cWhy was she so quick to report it? \u00a0She must be doing it for attention\/money.\u201d
\u201cShe must have led him on.\u201d<\/p>\n
All of these things are hurtful, damaging and designed to put the blame on victims, and deter other victims (regardless of gender) from coming forward. \u00a0But what is not often considered or spoken of, is the effect of long-term victim blaming.<\/p>\n
\u201cShe said she was raped, but she\u2019s out there going to clubs!\u201d
\u201cHer boyfriend\u2019s in prison for attacking her, but look at her kissing someone else!\u201d
\u201cHow can she be so happy, after what she said happened? \u00a0She must be a liar!\u201d
\u201cShe ruined his life by reporting him for sexual assault! \u00a0Now she\u2019s always smiling in photos!\u201d<\/p>\n
The above examples all reinforce a nasty myth: once something bad (sexually) happens to a woman, she must remain in mourning for the rest of her life. \u00a0No smiles, no sex, no new relationships (especially not lesbian or bisexual ones). \u00a0It also plays into the myth of the \u2018Almighty Dick of Power.\u2019 And of how it can affect you permanently. \u00a0This is the same myth that states \u201cOne dick can turn a queer woman straight!\u201d<\/p>\n
The truly sad thing is, many women believe these myths too.
\u201cHow can you go out to a party\/Wear that short dress\/Talk about positive sex? \u00a0Do you want to be assaulted again?\u201d<\/p>\n
And when these women are lesbians, it sometimes colours their view of bisexual women and other lesbians who have been raped\/sexually assaulted too. \u00a0The \u201cAlmighty Dick\u201d means that if you\u2019ve been with one man, consensual or not, you\u2019re tainted for life. \u00a0The Almighty Dick is partnered with the Gold Star Lesbian.<\/p>\n